CASUAL SEX in the absence of commitment can be fun for some, but it is not the same thing as making love. As Carl Whitaker commented, “Casual sex is an impersonal date between a penis and a vagina.” If you’ve taken the necessary health precautions, the two of you can remain physically safe, but there’s still the risk of emotional danger.
It’s very difficult to be sure that each of you stays on the same level of attachment or detachment as the other. One person is likely to believe there is more than physical fun involved and then get hurt. The other may feel guilty and try to make believe he or she feels more affection or love than was ever intended. What happens next is anybody’s guess.
Some couples get married out of guilt and end up falling in love. Others move on to other partners apparently without negative emotional consequences. Some find the physical intimacy without the emotional component draining, demoralizing, and ultimately, not as much fun as they thought it would be.
Alliances built on romantic illusions often end up as encounters of the most painful kind.