Do we need people or don’t we? This question has caused much confusion for many people, as each searches for love and for meaning. The answer is yes. Yes, we do need other people- and yes, we don’t.
We need love and we need to be loved. We have family; we make friends; we belong to a community. We need some other people to be with us, as a life affirming part of our lives.
But we don’t need those other people to be us, for then we aren’t. In other words, we cannot look to others to fill the needs that only we can fill for ourselves. If we depend on them to be responsible for what they cannot do, the natural consequence will be failure to have our hopes fulfilled. No one can make us feel good about ourselves. No one can take away our shame. No one can give us peace or make us happy.
If you are willing to accept just how scared and helpless you sometimes feel, you’ll spend less of your life fighting off depression and anxiety, feeling like a victim, and denying your own adequacy. You may also find some intimate companions along the way.
Live well and others may join you.