OFTEN WE see ourselves as successful human beings because we succeed at something. The problem is that when our efforts fail, we define ourselves as failures. At such times we are likely to lose out on the self-esteem to which we’re entitled because of our honest efforts to do things right.
Our need for mastery and certainty tempts us to categorize our actions and attitudes as either good or bad, wise or foolish, adequate or inadequate. Our moods change accordingly, so we’re continuously on a roller-coaster ride of inflated highs and exaggerated lows.
When we lose interest in categorizing our efforts, we’ll be relieved to give up the double-entry bookkeeping of gold stars and demerits. And if there is an angel at the gate of heaven, it’s doubtful that we would be asked, “How often did you get it right?” More likely, the question would be, “Did you do as well as you could?”
If God can forgive our imperfections, who are we not to forgive ourselves?