To some extent, we all still live in the darkness of our own unfinished past. The refusal to mourn the disappointments and losses of childhood (as well as other ages and stages of our lives), to bury them once and for all, condemns us to live in their shadows.
Genuine grief is the sobbing and wailing that ex-press the acceptance of our helplessness to do any-thing about our loss. If instead we complain, insist that this cannot be, or demand to be compensated for our pain, then we are forever stuck with trying to bring back what can’t possibly be redeemed. If we refuse to accept that we cannot change our past misfortunes, we will also lose the warm, loved feelings of past joys. Future pleasures will taste bittersweet if their flavor is spoiled by the ashes of the past.
We must allow ourselves to feel sad and helpless, and then we must go on.