MANY OF us worry a lot about why it’s sometimes so hard to get along with other people. When two of us interact we often experience what goes on in such different ways that it’s a wonder we get along well as often as we do. Sometimes there are such great disparities in our points of view that if either of us could see things through the other’s eyes each of our visions of our relationship would make no sense at all.
Perhaps we worry too much about what went wrong and take too little time trying to identify what it was that worked so well. It’s tempting to take satisfying interactions for granted, rather than risk disrupting them by exploring what we might be doing that contributes to these lovely moments.
In any case, we are better off experiencing relationships than analyzing them. But if we are going to devote some energy to solving problems in our relationships, it might serve us well to give at least equal time to examining what it is that sometimes makes our being together such a wonderful experience.
If it’s not broken, don’t fix it; but do take a look at what makes it work so well.