{"id":1183,"date":"2012-11-18T03:45:43","date_gmt":"2012-11-18T03:45:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/?p=1183"},"modified":"2025-11-11T01:11:30","modified_gmt":"2025-11-11T07:11:30","slug":"relationships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/?p=1183","title":{"rendered":"Relationships"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>RELATIONSHIP MATHEMATICS<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Smart man + smart woman = romance<\/li>\n<li>Smart man + dumb woman = affair<\/li>\n<li>Dumb man + smart woman = marriage<\/li>\n<li>Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>OFFICE ARITHMETIC<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Smart boss + smart employee = profit<\/li>\n<li>Smart boss + dumb employee = production<\/li>\n<li>Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion<\/li>\n<li>Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>SHOPPING MATH<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.<\/li>\n<li>A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn&#8217;t need.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>GENERAL EQUATIONS &amp; STATISTICS<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.<\/li>\n<li>A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.<\/li>\n<li>A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.<\/li>\n<li>A successful woman is one who can find such a man.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>HAPPINESS<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.<\/li>\n<li>To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>LONGEVITY Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.<\/p>\n<p>MEMORY Any married man should forget his mistakes; there&#8217;s no use in two people remembering the same thing.<\/p>\n<p>APPEARANCE<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Men wake up as good-looking (or ugly) as they went to bed.<\/li>\n<li>Women somehow deteriorate during the night.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>PROPENSITY TO CHANGE<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn&#8217;t.<\/li>\n<li>A man marries a woman expecting that she won&#8217;t change, and she does<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>A woman has the last word in any argument.<\/li>\n<li>Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>COMPREHENSION There are two times when a man doesn&#8217;t understand a woman :<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>before marriage and<\/li>\n<li>after marriage.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, cackling and poking me in the ribs, telling me, &#8220;You&#8217;re next.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>MARRIAGE, BEFORE AND AFTER<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman of his dreams.<\/li>\n<li>After marriage, the &#8220;y&#8221; is silent<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>RELATIONSHIP MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man + smart [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1183","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-other"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2R4NI-j5","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1183","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1183"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1183\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3584,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1183\/revisions\/3584"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1183"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1183"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodsoul.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1183"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}