Many couples make what they think is a commitment to a monogamous relationship. Usually what them mean is, “I am committed to refrain from a romantic or sexual involvement with anyone else- so long as my partner keeps me happy, or unless I meet someone irresistible.” The promise they make to themselves and/or their mate often is meant to be sincere, but the conditional clauses undermine the validity of the contract.

How different it feels when your vow of devotion means, “I will not get involved with anyone else so long as our relationship continues. If we become so unhappy with one another that we cannot work out our problems, we may have to end our relationship. Only then, will I allow myself to take on another romance.” This act of devotion is undertaken with full understanding that there will often be temptations to resist.

Don’t make promises you can’t keep.